Missing Cupid

Last Sunday it was pouring heavily and we all were exited to go out and enjoy heavy showers. We planned and went to the holding pond in sector 10 and it was almost heavenly to walk alongside the water body.

Few enthusiastic were also seen enjoying walking, eating Pani-Puri, sandwitches etc…after getting wet it's an heavenly experience for sure.

Also we saw couples of all age groups occupying different corners, making best of the privacy they got. It's not a rare site anymore we see them everywhere; I have got used to ignore them and enjoy my things. But I saw a couple where both of them looked from the age group of 15 to 17 involved in overt display of "so called" affection in public. I was programmed to look the other way, but secretly hoped my daughter who is in the same age group did not see it.

I know I was foolish to think that way as it has become difficult to avoid such incidents in one's life. Normally I just shoe off such thoughts and convince my mind about the impact of "Sanskars" I have given my family. But lot of thoughts started popping in my mind and I thought of penning them down.

Children today start dating from a very young age-sometimes even at a very tender age like 14yrs, they also get more physical. The relationship does not last for more than 1, 2 years in most of such cases, then another one. So by the time they are 21, 22 they have already experienced 3 to 4 break ups for different reasons and gone through the relative pain. By 21 yrs they are now determined not to now fall for anything, they are now on high alert before saying they are in "love."

They are all in the category of-yes I like him / her but very few would really say I love her / him.

Reasons-

They are confused in terms, like and love- boy and a girl like to do many things together but after some time they realize this is not what they wanted anyway.

Today's generation is programmed to love themselves more than anybody else-the way they are brought up by over indulgent parents. Everybody is then afraid of commitment; they are scared to say that they love somebody. They would say very easily they love their dog or a cat as he or she in relationship would expect a marriage if the partner says he/she loves him/her.

Also everybody is in hurry to make it big, In my parent's generation buying a flat after retirement was a great deal of satisfaction, in my generation we all tried having it before the age of 40 but today they want to have it all before even they are ready to marry. They have bound themselves by so many things so love and marriage seems to have taken back seat in this younger generation.

There is also a sizable minority who prefer to stay single as they have already been through lot of pain during earlier relationship and prefer devoting their time to work.

There is too much to do in too little time, looks like "love" is simply missing. In this age of too many opportunities for dating, clubbing, partying we see individuals lonely inside with all the crowd cheering outside. All this easy access to relationship at early age is actually hampering the innocence attached to the phenomena called "love" everyone wants to have a good looking, rich partner. The "soul to soul" relationship is becoming more and more difficult to get.

When I got married, I or Nitin never had questions like- what has he done in his past - I better know.

But today's generation will need lot of time to trust each other as so much is going on around them.

We were also saved from "Peer pressure" angle in our generation. During workshops with college students I realized that if the girl friend or boy friend is not approved by friends or if they think "not up to the mark" they eventually dump the girl or a boy for no other reason. Very rarely they actually can stand for their choice as that maturity in relationship is totally missing. The dumped partner then succumbs to depression or even suicidal tendencies.

I surely don't belong to "Moral policing Group" but feel sad that in the want of aping western culture we have sent Cupid on sabbatical.